Jean Marie Finch
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Loving wife, sister, mother, grandmother, and friend, Jean Marie Finch, passed away unexpectedly on 2 April 2024 at her home. Jean was born on 17 May 1958, and spent her childhood in Missouri, Oklahoma, and Kansas. She was a gifted student, where alongside her academic excellence, she also starred in drama and swam competitively. She graduated with honors from Kapaun Mt. Carmel Catholic High School in Wichita, then attended the University of Kansas, where she majored in English Literature.
While at KU, she met her future husband, Ray; they were married in June 1978. Upon graduation, Jean supported Ray and their growing family in his Army career, moving to Oklahoma, Germany, California, and Kansas. Even amidst the demands of motherhood (or maybe because of them), Jean began training as a long-distance runner in the early 1980s, going on to compete in many races including the San Francisco, Kansas City, Berlin, and Boston marathons. She also earned a certification as a Montessori instructor, teaching for nearly a decade at the Montessori Childrens’ House of Lawrence and in Atrium – a faith-based Montessori program at both St. John’s and the Haskell Catholic Center. Later, she tutored at-risk Native American children in a special program within USD 497.
In 2009, Jean made her profession as a secular Franciscan in the Franciscan Order, where she continued to follow the Gospel in the model of St. Francis. In 2016, Jean became the Director of the Haskell Catholic Center, where she has served with the utmost patience, professionalism, and kindness. She was tireless in her efforts to both attract and instruct Haskell students, staff, and faculty to the beauty and wisdom of the Christian faith.
Despite all of her academic, sporting, professional and spiritual accomplishments, her greatest joy stemmed from her role as mother and grandmother. She loved her children and grandchildren with undying loyalty, ardent affection, and everlasting concern. She would do literally anything for them.
Jean was preceded in death by her parents (Robert and Marigene DesMarteau), her aunt and uncle (Joann and John Phillips), her brothers (Phil and Steve DesMarteau), a daughter (Maria) who died in infancy, and nephew (Bobby). She is survived by her husband, (Ray), her children (John and his spouse Raelean, Katie and her partner Sean, Ray IV and Tommy), grandchildren (Elizabeth, Caileigh, Solomon, Sebastian and Molly), her sister (Tricia and husband, Kevin Leeper) and many cousins, nieces, and nephews.
Memorial contributions can be made to one of the local charities listed below:
Lawrence DARE Center: https://www.darecenterlawrence.org/takeaction
Bert Nash Community Mental Health Center: https://www.bertnash.org/support
Family Promise of Lawrence: https://lawrencefamilypromise.org/donate-now/
or may be sent in care of Warren-McElwain Mortuary, 120 W. 13th Street, Lawrence, KS 66044.
I am so sorry to hear of Jean’s death. I saw her often at the Haskell Catholic Student center when I’d go to see Father Mike. She was a devout reader and sacristan at St. John’s with an ever ready smile. Our loss. Heaven’s gain.
Jean was a beautiful person with deep religious convictions. She always had a smile on her face. Her presence at St. John’s will be sorely missed. I pray the Lord wraps his loving arms your family during this time. Rest assured, she is with the Heavenly Father watching over us.
I am so sorry to hear about Jean’s passing. She was a wonderful person as a friend and also a community advocate. She will be greatly missed by so many. My prayers are with her family.
Jean will be sorely missed. Jean was one of those people if you were to run into she would light up with a smile that just simply uplifted you. Blessings to the Finch family and may she rest in the arms of Christ
This is devastating news. Jean was truly saintly. I can’t imagine Ray’s pain. Prayers of healing and peace for the surviving Family Members.
I had the pleasure of coordinating with Jean on her daughter’s wedding reception at the KU Alumni Association. She was a delight to work with and my sympathies go out to the family.
Jean was lovely. We are all so fortunate that she touched our lives. My prayers for solace go to Ray and the family. Farewell, Jean.
Such a shock to read about Jean’s sudden passing. We enjoyed our time with her and the family in Germany and she was such a light in the world. I especially enjoyed seeing her at daily masses. May God give Ray and her children so much comfort during this difficult time
I loved Jean’s spirit. She always had a smile on her face. She was like a polished diamond- always shining. The last day I seen her was on Easter Sunday. She brought Donuts to OK Hall and she gave me a compliment. I will never forget her. ~ Darla Harrison ~ CRA @ OK Hall.
Jean was one of the most kind hearted people I’ve got the pleasure to know. She was also strong, compassionate, and wise. Rest in Beauty, Jean. Your memory will be cherished.
I’m still in disbelief 😢 Jean was such a remarkable woman and welcomed me with open arms when I attended Haskell. She will truly be missed. Our condolences to her family and may creator shower them with healing and comfort💛💜
I just was stunned by the news of her death. Jean & our family grew up together & even though we were far away, when we see each other, it was like no time had passed. Her faith & family was her life & she was a beacon of shining Christian faith.
Our condolences to Ray & the family & her sister Trish. She will be remembered with fondness & that beautiful smile.
My sincere condolences on the unexpected passing of Jean. She always had a smile on her face and a hello to great everyone.
I was surprised to hear about Jean’s passing.
Our children went to school together and whenever I would see Jean at school or church she had a smile and made each person she encountered feel special. You could see God working through her! She lived her life for God and family. I pray your faith will bring you peace knowing she is in her eternal home .
Your family will be in my thoughts and prayers as you grieve this life changing loss.
With deep sympathy and love,
Sue Glatz
I have so many beautiful memories of Jean. I knew her as a school parent at St. John School and a devoted Catholic at St John Church and later at Haskell. I always felt that her gentle and kind spirit kept her young. She is an angel among us.
I grew up with Jean and her lovely family. I remember seeing her in her senior high school play, “The Music Man”. She was a bright star on stage and a bright star in real life. Like so many people have said, she always had a smile to give to you. She had a sweet and gentle spirit and her faith gave her much strength. Once she put her mind to something, it got done!
She will be missed, but even as each day passes and it is one day father from when we saw Jean, it is one day closer till we will see her again and all our loved ones who have passed on.
I pray for strength, calm and peace for Ray and your family. Much love to all of you.
I was so sorry to hear of Jean’s passing and will miss her immensely, as I know many others will. To the family I offer my most sincere condolences. You will be in my thoughts and prayers. I had the honor of becoming a professed Secular Franciscan on the same day as Jean; we weathered initial formation and our years on the fraternity Council together. Rest in peace, dear sister and beloved friend!
I’m so shocked and heartbroken to hear this news. I have such fond memories of playing next door at your house and being struck by Jean’s beauty, warmth, gentle and kind nature. I have a strong memory of her buying a car and having it painted a fiery red. And of visiting her in the kitchen of the monastery at the corner, watching her cook for the brothers. Holding all of you in my heart and sending so much love.
I was very saddened and surprised to hear of jeans death. We practiced yoga together and although I did not know her well, I always felt as though I had known her for years.She had such a kind and warm feeling about her, and yes, always a smile on her face. One of my last conversations with her was about how excited she was because she was getting ready to go visit her daughter in Colorado and going to meet her new grandchild❤️ Wow, what a wake up call for all of us! Life is so precious and such a gift. My heart is with her family and all who knew her🙏🏻
you are in my thoughts and prayers
Dear Ray,
So very sorry to hear this sad news. Please accept my deepest condolences and most heartfelt sympathy. I lost my dear wife just seven months ago. You and your family will be in be in the prayers of my family, and we will have a Mass offered. May Our Lord and His Blessed Mother, and all of the Angels and Saints send you the grace of consolation.
We are so very, very sorry to hear of Jean’s passing. What a light in many lives. We are quite sure her trip home will be brief and bring her great joy and peace. Its just sad for many of us who will miss her.
Though I haven’t seen Jean in a few years, I will always remember her positivity, her energy and most of all her infectious smile. What a marvelous life! Condolences to friends and family.
I was very saddened to hear of Jean’s passing. She was a wonderful light in this world. Condolences to her family. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Sorrowful loss for all that Jean crossed paths with. Remembering you all in my prayers & grateful for having her as a Montessori instructor for my children in the Atrium. I cherish the memento she gifted me from her time in Germany and the campaign for Fr Mike’s return. What a beautiful loving soul, ❤️ a legacy she leaves with each of us & her family.
A musical tribute for Jean Marie Finch. “Jean” by Rod McKuen, sung by Oliver.
You may shed a tear or ten recalling Jean Marie, which is most appropriate when realizing the passing of such an eminently lovable person.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hozEk-eCYwc
Jean was a beautiful person always full of faith and joy for life. May she know the peace and joy of Christ our Savior in heaven, and may her family know the strength of our faith and the hope that one day we shall be together again!
Jean was my first and forever friend from age two. We were supposed to live to be very old ladies of course. Our families lived across the street from each other and we grew up together. We knew each other with the uncensored joy of early childhood. Jean was extraordinary then and throughout her life. I am still feeling stunned that my first and forever best friend has died. For Trish, Ray, John, Katie, Ray IV and Tommy I can only imagine this is even more profound as her sister, husband, sons and daughter. I know Jean got a direct flight to heaven. I now know she will be the first person to greet me there and show me the way. That gives me significant comfort even as I am still resisting accepting her death.
Jean was a person who truly lived her faith. She “walked the talk” in so many ways. Those Sunday mornings during the pandemic when she gave communion in the Haskell Newman Center parking lot were such a comfort and connection. Aho, Jean.
The curfew tolls the knell of parting day,
The lowing herd wind slowly o’er the lea,
The plowman homeward plods his weary way,
And leaves the world to darkness and to me…….
Tears? Mourning? Sorrow? Particularly in this season of Easter when nature herself is blooming forth in renewed life? Well, Yes! ‘Twould be wrong not to mourn the loss of a good soul, a soul such as Jean who was not merely a listener of the good, but a doer as well.
No wonder she found her spiritual path in the model of St. Francis whose own modeling of the divine goodness was such that the Mohammedans’ were so impressed by Francis’ embodiment of the divine goodness that they put down their blood thirsty swords. Jean heard and responded to the divine voice of the good and solemnized it with profession of secular Franciscan vows. Lessons in goodness can be learned from reviewing the life of Jean Marie DesMarteau Finch.
No superficial sanguinity here; no cliches or pleasant bromide sentiments. Grieve we must, particularly showing empathy for her beloved family. ‘Twould be a travesty to even consider having to hire professional mourners. We have our Lord’s own curious response to ponder, a veritable cause of wonderment to consider. For He, Himself shed tears at the passing of Lazarus, though He knew that He was going to raise Lazarus. Perhaps “He was troubled in spirit, moved by the deepest emotions” (John 11:33) was not so much due to the death of Lazarus—who was shortly to be called forth from death—but from the grief He empathically experienced from Lazarus’ sisters, also His dear friends, and their gathered circle of friends. “Jesus began to weep” (John 11:35)
……..No farther seek her merits to disclose,
Or draw her frailties from their dread abode,
(There they alike in trembling hope repose)
The bosom of her Father and her God.
Holy Sonnet X
Death be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadfull, for, thou art not soe,
For, those, whom thou think’st, thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poore death, nor yet canst thou kill mee.
From rest and sleepe, which but thy pictures bee,
Much pleasure, then from thee, much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee doe goe,
Rest of their bones, and souls deliverie.
Thou art slave to Fate, Chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poyson, warre, and sicknesse dwell,
And poppie, or charmes can make us sleepe as well,
And better than thy stroake; why swell’st thou then?
One short sleepe past, wee wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; death, thou shalt die.
Our family has always been so inspired by Jean and her incredible love and light that she shared with so many. We first met her exactly 30 years ago when we first attended St. John’s Parish in Lawrence. Sharing a faith journey and a parenting journey with her gave us so many inspirations that we still remember and reflect upon 30 years later. We are so honored to have known her and benefitted from the blessings shared from her time here on earth. Love you, Jean~
Thank you Jean for being so patient and kind. You guided me to full communion and showed me the ways of the Catholic faith. I’ll keep you in my heart and I’ll never forget you.
I remember Jean when Secular Franciscans was just starting here.
A wonderful rep for the Catholic religion. Gone way too soon.
Jean and I met in Buffalo shortly after she married Ray. She struck me as warm and kind, lit from within with love. Years later I visited her and Ray when they were living in Germany. Last year while driving cross-country I visited them in Lawrence. I got out of my car after a long day’s drive; she and Ray asked what I needed. I said I needed to stretch my legs. So Jean took me for a long walk. I don’t remember what we talked about, just that it was a lively discussion. She was genuinely interested in other people which made her a marvelous conversationalist. She arranged for JD and family to come over for supper that evening so I could meet his family. When we said good-bye the following day I told her I wished we lived closer to one another. I look forward to our next encounter in Heaven. God bless you, Jean. Rest in peace.
Jean is a person/woman of conviction and compassion. She did not get angry with people, but was capable of righteous indignation with systems of power (even church systems) when they did not live up to the Beatitudes (or even some commandments.) She lived her faith far better than I ever could. She was understanding of my struggles — never judged — and I deeply valued the time I did have with her. It is my sorrow that we would, over and over, for years, say “We need to get together,” but then rarely made it happen. Mea culpa. Jean made the lives of others so much better with every hour she spent with them.
Jean was one of my mentors while in orientation with the Secular Franciscans at Brother Jacoba fraternity in Lawrence and I saw her most every Sunday this last year at Tekakwitha House / Haskell Catholic Campus Center. I’m still in shock and disbelief and haven’t processed but I will miss her, her compassionate accepting presence.