Helen Kokka Gee
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Helen Kokka Gee, 82, died peacefully at home in Lawrence, Kansas on Friday, December 23, 2022, after a long struggle with Alzheimer’s disease. Norman Gee, her devoted husband of 57 years, was at her side.
Born Helen Kieko Kokka on January 31, 1940, she was the eighth child and third daughter born to Satoru and Shizuye (Hoshino) Kokka in Watsonville, California. Her parents, Japanese immigrants, raised ten children in Watsonville. From 1942 to 1945 Helen and her family, along with tens of thousands of other Japanese Americans, were imprisoned in a concentration camp at Poston, Arizona, even as her oldest brother, Tommy, served with honor in the 442nd Regimental Combat Team of the U.S. Army.
The Kokka family survived the incarceration and rebuilt their life in Watsonville, sending all their children to college. Helen graduated from the University of California at Berkeley with a degree in zoology and taught high school biology at Richmond High School. She married Norman Gee in Watsonville on June 27, 1965, and supported her husband through his graduate studies in fine arts. When Norman accepted a one-year teaching position in the art department at the University of Kansas in Lawrence in 1969, Helen remained in California and continued teaching. In 1970, Norman’s position turned tenure-track; Helen left her career behind and joined him in Kansas.
Helen was a loving mother to her two children and was active with their schools and the community, frequently volunteering at the polls on election day. Once her children were in middle school, she went to work as a grant’s administrator at Haskell Indian Nations University, and also worked in the Office of Minority Affairs at the University of Kansas.
Helen always spoke her mind and told it to you straight; her feisty spirit was much bigger than her four feet ten inches. She was an avid mystery reader, a talented seamstress who made beautiful clothes, a huge Kansas basketball fan, a wonderful cook, and a generous hostess. Family and friends will always remember her gentle nature, beautiful smile, liberal use of profanity, and how loved and welcome she made them feel.
She was preceded in death by her parents and three of her older brothers: Tameki Tommy Kokka, Norio Kokka, and Yoshimi Henry Kokka. She is survived by her husband; her children Mikka Gee (J. Michael) Conway and Brian Christopher Gee; her siblings Misako Ohmura, Kuniko Shimoguchi, Haruo Kokka, Osami (Sam) Kokka, Hitoshi (John) Kokka, and Sumaye Arleen Cowan; and numerous nieces, nephews, grand-nieces, and grand-nephews.
No formal services are planned. The family suggests memorials in Helen’s name to the Poston Community Alliance, 1902 Strayhorn Rd., Pleasant Hill, CA, 94523; contributions may be sent in the care of Warren-McElwain Mortuary, 120 W. 13th Street, Lawrence, KS 66044. The family is thankful for the many calls and notes of sympathy and support.
Sincere condolences. I am grateful for many good memories.
To my dearest Gee family,
I am lucky to have had Helen in my life. She made me smile, laugh and I always felt welcomed from the moment we met.
Her love for her children, grandchildren and Norman was sunshine for the soul.
When I needed to talk or share life experiences she was there for me.
I will keep her in my heart and memory forever.
I love you Gee Family.
My heart goes out to the Gee family. Helen was a warm and wonderful person. Cherish the fond memories and please accept my deepest regards.
Stanley Ross and family condolences .
Our hearts go out to Norman and family. We hope you find peace in your grief.
Love,
Donika Wiley & Michael Krueger
We will always remember Helen as a wonderful neighbor, second mother/first cook to Bryan, generous to all of us, incredibly kind, welcoming, quietly brilliant. Deepest condolences to Norman, Mikka, and Brian. Peace. From Carolyn, Jason, and Bryan Young and Michelle Young Bartholomew
When I came to Lawrence in 1977, the Gees werewelcoming. Helen always had a smile. The only time she was not pleased with me was one New Year’s Eve Partyat her home. I offered to stir fry a shredded pork dish with Ham Ha, preserved shrimp paste. The “fragrance” was so pungent that it drove all the guests to the living room and outside in the cold. The guest drank some more. Helen didn’t used the 4 letter word on me. And Norman loved the dish.
When I came to Lawrence in 1977, the Gees were welcoming. Helen always had a smile. The only time she was not pleased with me was one New Year’s Eve Party at her home. I offered to stir fry a shredded pork dish with Hum Ha, preserved shrimp paste. The “fragrance” was so pungent that it drove all the guests to the living room and outside in the cold. The guest drank some more. Helen didn’t used the 4 letter word on me. And Norman loved the dish. Imaging her smile now.
Norman and family, I am so sorry for your loss. Do take care of yourselves as you will miss her companionship more than you can imagine. Love to all of you.
So sorry for your loss.
Norman, I remember the first time I met you and Helen. You were living in an apartment behind the house Susan and I lived in on New Hampshire Street. My heart goes out to you and your family. Love to you and your family.
What a beautiful picture gorgeous bubbling with life just the the way she was the last time I saw her week before. What a beautiful obituary what a beautiful story. I’m having a beer and saluting Norman,Helen,Brian and Mikka. But it’s not nearly as much fun as drinking Hellen’s goofy Japanese wine with her and all her interesting friends at their Christmas parties and basketball games. The tradition must go on in her honor. Love and admiration Claudia and Charley Kincaid
Norman and family. I am so sorry to hear you have lost your wonderful wife and mother. I so enjoyed my time working with her at Haskell. She had such a great sense of humor and was just fun to be with. I know you have wonderful memories of your long life together that will keep her close. All my best, Sandy Praeger
Your smile filled the room.
You were so smart,
So kind,
So generous.
My favorite meals were at
Your beautiful table.
The laughter,
The joy.
Thank you for teaching me
Your Mah Jong.
I loved playing with you
Even tho you always won!
You picked the Kentucky Derby winner.
Mozel Tov.
The laughter,
The love.
I will remember.
I raise my glass to you.
May your memory
Be for a blessing
Sending so much love from Seattle from the Kuwana family. My parents (and I!) have fond memories of spending time with the Gees. My parents loved watching KU basketball games with Helen and Norman and eating…always lots of food!
Our sincere condolences to Norman, Mikka and Brian. Helen was a remarkable friend to so many who appreciated her generosity, sharp wit and humor. She created an atmosphere of friends exchanging stories, eating wonderful food, and laughing with Helen because she made sharp and accurate observations that we truly appreciated. Memories and love, Sue and Tom Lorenz.
Warm regards to the Gee family.
Brian, I wish you peace and strength as you navigate the emotional currents that come with this tremendous change in your life.
Helen was such a part of my life for so long, I don’t know where to begin. I remember distinctly that even when I was just a student, Helen talked to me as an equal; in fact, it was the first time an adult had done so. We had good talks about Japan, Japanese food, and who could forget the New Year’s Day parties and the rolling of sushi? Her devotion to sports was formidable (so much so that she had to leave the room if the Jayhawks were losing or the game was close) and being able to watch Final Four championships (both 1988 and 2022), the Royals win the World Series and the Chiefs win at the Super Bowl from the Gees living room is special. Even when words began failing her, her face carried much joy. I miss her.
We were heart broken to hear of Helen’s passing two days before Christmas. We met Norman and Helen over 50 years ago when we moved to Lawrence. We have had so many good times with the Gees and and many fond memories throughout the years. We’ll miss Helen in our visits to Lawrence. We know that Norman, Mikka, Mike, and Brian will keep memories of Helen in their hearts forever.
This is a beautifully written obituary of Helen’s history. Thank you, Mikka.
We are so sorry for your loss. We enjoyed working with her at Haskell.
Helen was such a wonderful person. Norman was my painting instructor at KU and they lived down the street. I used to stop by and talk to them. She was always so kind and listened and offered suggestions like a big sister if I was having student issues . She will be greatly missed.
My condolences to her lovely talented and kind family. Who made a difference in my life and so many others . Peace be with you all.
Dear Norman and Family. I have so many great memories of good times together. I have a great photo of you and Helen dancing at my millenial New Years Eve party. And what fun we had at your New Years Day parties. Helen always out did her self with such wonderful food. Please know that I am thinking of you.